I cheat when I write poetry
I use a rhyming website
Collected by a guy named Van
I emailed him one night
How it reminds me of this type chess
Where competitors use the help of AI
Humans still choose the moves
But blunders don't pass by
I haven't heard back yet
I don't like the nervousness time creates
An admirer joked I should write about it
So I wrote this poem that demonstrates
Of Van's chest:
A fan's jest
The Stack of Cats
There once was a stack of cats
Who owed dues to top hats
They conducted legal combat
Against the top of the bat
Feline Fee Line v. Lion
I Haven't Cleaned My Car in 6 Years
Ten realizations I came to while cleaning my car so I could sell it:
1. McDonald's fries are forever.
2. Here is a book that I thought I would read when I found myself bored in my car. I never made it past the first chapter.
3. Taco Bell cheese shreds are forever.
4. Someone left a banana peel underneath my passenger seat and I somehow never noticed.
5. Here is a tennis racket that was supposed to be used to play rounds with random strangers at the park. I have never used it.
6. Here is a bag filled with swimming stuff that was bought in the hope of developing a daily routine. It was only used once, and it smells heavily of chlorine. I will have to burn it.
7. Pennies, more so than other coins, are not forever. They rust so badly that they look more like flattened breath mints than a valid form of currency.
8. I am cleaning my car to not embarrass myself in front of an auto interior detailer who has already seen worse and knows that being embarrassed by the cleanliness of your car is a slippery slope towards giving up on your car.
9. The car is just a machine to get you from point A to point B. Any meaning that you place beyond this is an expression of your personality and moral framework.
10. The boogers that you wipe underneath your seat as the driver- those are forever.
Jaron Saturnino is a web designer and editor of <a href="http://lit.cat/">Lit.cat</a>, a literary journal that randomly generates its 30 minute issues and masthead poem every day.